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Do as I say to do; NOT as I do......

Do as I say to do; Not as I do.....


Baloo was barking and raising Cain in the back yard.

I get up to check. Trash truck going down the alley. Normal.

Trash truck leaves and Baloo is still barking.

Get up and look out the window to the back yard. He's got his tail down and is walking in circles barking.

Can't see anything from the dining room window, so I check out the window in the door from the utility room to the back yard.

There's a chocolate brown snake about 2 1/2 feet long on the patio at the house.
I go out for a closer look. Don't know what kind it is, but it's obvious that it's not poisonous.
Get the camera.
Take a few pictures.  Normal routine when finding something a bit unusual/interesting/etc.

Bite Me

8/13/10, 11:26 AM
8/13/10, 11:26 AM
9/3/10, 5:31 PM

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Get the broom and try to chase the snake off. It crawls into a bush and I don't see it any more.
I go back to work.


Just before lunch, I go out to look for the snake.
I look around the patio where it was earlier.
Look under the bush where I last saw it.
Start to move off the patio onto a flagstone path that we're working on.
Something smacks the inside of my shoe (flip-flops) on the left foot. Thought I had stepped on a twig that raked the side of my shoe.
Look down.
Brown snake moving at a high rate of speed headed for the back fence/trumpet vines/honey suckle vines/etc..
A light turns on in my head. I have been struck by the snake.
The air turns blue with extreme profanity.
I dump enough adrenalin for the whole SWAT team serving a felony warrant.
Stomp and mumble more foul language for a minute or 2 .... vibrating like a dirt packer.
Back in the house.
Pick up a smoke.
Go to the front porch to sit in the rocker, smoke, and to check out the shoe to see if I can confirm what I thought had happened.
Pull shoe off.
Drop of blood on my finger.
Tiny scratch on my foot just behind the ball of my foot.

I'm 56 years old. Lived in snake country all my life. I KNOW better..... and I got snake bit in my own back yard, living in town.
Got lucky.....the shoe took most of the bite.... a minor scrape on my foot..... maybe from the bottom jaw.
Clean it with peroxide. Ointment. Band-aid.
Adrenaline bottoms out.....gotta eat.
Consume x-thousand calories.
Look in the mirror.....all I see is the north end of a south-bound donkey with the words "DUMB ASS" flashing.
The echo in my head of the words I spoke last evening to my grand son, daughter, daughter's partner, and a friend of mine (while looking for escaped canines in waist tall weeds and grass in Eastern New Mexico):

Watch where the hell you put your feet! There's snakes out here!

Information added Sept. 9, 2010.

Identification and verification

I sent a message to Clint "The Snake Man" Pustejovsky asking if I was correctly calling this unfriendly critter a "Blotched Water Snake".  Here's his reply:

Subject: Re: Blotched Water Snake?  

Yep, nonvenomous Blotched water snake. The story adds entertainment to my day.


Sincerely, Clint "The Snake Man" Pustejovsky

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